EP 55: Elevate Your Vibe: Celebrating Wins, Embracing Chaos and Setting Boundaries!

Ever felt like you're carrying too many emotional passengers on your personal elevator? I unravel this weighty metaphor to remind ourselves that not everyone deserves a ride on our journey. Sharing insights on embracing intuition, I stress the importance of surrounding yourself with those who truly uplift you. Celebrate the joy of being unapologetically you and understand that it's perfectly okay if not everyone is your cheerleader.

Welcome to another Episode of the Sew Flipping Extra Podcast!

A platform for me to express, explore, connect and over all be Sew Flipping Extra... why because that brings me joy.

Life's a whirlwind, and my week was no exception. From flaunting a 90s Clueless-inspired ensemble on "This Morning" to embracing the vibrant chaos as a "Carnival Angel," my schedule was anything but predictable. Reflecting on the hustle, we discuss the power of acknowledging personal achievements and the lessons learned from quieter times. Whether it's sticking to a new gym routine or managing self-doubt, we explore how setting personal priorities shapes our experiences.

In business, setting the right price can be as deliciously satisfying as savoring a donut. We chat about the courage to value your work and challenge assumptions about what others can afford. Meanwhile, we dive into the hilarity and drama of "Pop the Balloon or Find Love," with a special nod to the Jamaican version. Plus, I’m thrilled to announce my role at the Clean and Tidy Home Show and share my excitement about future travels. Let’s celebrate every victory, no matter how small, and keep spreading positivity wherever we go.

Relevant Links
Clean & Tidy Home Show: https://www.instagram.com/cleanandtidyhomeshow/
This Morning Episode (time stamp 1h 42m): https://www.itv.com/watch/this-morning/1a1960/1a1960a9825
The Carnival Angels: https://www.instagram.com/thecarnivalangels/

Chapters

• 0:00 Not Everyone Will Like You
• 4:34 Navigating Busy Weeks and Self-Reflection
• 13:33 Pricing and Value in Business
• 21:29 Gossip and Event Announcement
• 26:00 Celebrating the Small Wins

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Because then what you give and give and give, and then what?

Speaker 1: 0:04

If you're pouring into everybody that doesn't deserve it, then who's pouring back into you? It's okay if they don't like you. That's it. Podcast is over. That's all I had to say. Mic drop. No, sorry, don't drop the mic. I paid money for this mic.

Speaker 1: 0:21

That's actually not how I wanted to start the episode, how I actually wanted to start this episode. Oh no, the way my back is itching, you know. Do you know what it feels like? You know, like in Baloo, I feel like I need to rub it on something. Ah, oh, that's better. Oh, hang on. No, this, oh, that's been, that's been bothering me all morning. Right, this is how I want to start this podcast.

Speaker 1: 0:47

I heard a saying this week, always hearing a saying every elevator has a weight cap, so there's only a certain amount of people that can go in the elevator so it can go to its destination. And where you're about to go, not everyone can go with you. Some people are going to have to get off the elevator because it's going to be too heavy, because you've got a destination to go to, and the thing is, we want to take everyone with us, we want everyone to win. We're like I'm, I'm going this way. Oh, you come with me. Not everyone wants to go with you the same way I just. I just started off. Not everyone likes you, and that's okay. It's okay if everyone doesn't like you. We have to get okay with the fact that not everyone is going to like us. I remember before I used to really want people to like me. I couldn't give a shit. I couldn't give a shit if you don't, honestly, because I like me. I like me so much now that I can't even understand why you wouldn't. But everyone has their reasons. Sometimes you're too much for people, it's okay. No one's going to like you. No one's going to gel with you. No one's going to sink with you. Some people are going to find you so fucking annoying. I know this. If I meet people like me, I'm like rah. They're annoying. Am I like that? Am I? Is that me? No, it's surely not. Not everyone's going to like you, babes, and that's okay. Not everyone's going to be able to go with you, and that's okay.

Speaker 1: 2:20

Intuition is so important. It's so important, as we get older, to tap into our intuition, to tap into what feels right. What feels right that is so key. What feels good, what makes you feel good, who comes around you and is in your energy and makes you feel good. Who, when they're around you, you feel good. Who, when they're around you, you're like, you feel euphoric, you feel like, okay, I've never taken something, but I can imagine when you've taken something I've heard people talk about drugs or whatever and it's like like who just makes you feel like you're on something, you're on stuff and you're just lifted and you're floating and you're soaring.

Speaker 1: 3:05

Pay attention, because those are the people that you want to put yourself around more and those are the people that you want to learn from and those are the people that you want to, um, get from. And those are also the people that you want to give to, because you can't be given to everybody. Not everyone can get from you, because then what you give and give and give, and then what? If you're pouring into everybody that doesn't deserve it, then who's pouring back into you? And with that said, let's start the podcast, because I didn't realize how much stuff I'd written down on my list of stuff that I just wanted to talk about today, like I spent this week just like hearing something or a feeling coming towards me and just tapping it into my notes so that I could discuss it with you guys on the podcast. And then I'll just go through my notes, like where am I starting? I was like I've been, I've been, I've been noting a lot, so you know, let's get into it. Hi guys, welcome to another episode of the so flippin extra, a platform for me to express, explore and connect and be so flippin' extra. Why, I hear you ask every single week. I don't understand why, because that's what brings me joy. So, without further ado, let's get into the podcast and let's get through these notes, because, whatever we don't get through this week, don't worry'm gonna be back next week and we're gonna get through it then. So this week I've actually had a really, really lovely week. Let's let's do a quick week recap.

Speaker 1: 4:34

It feels like I've been busy this week, but I wouldn't say I've been busy and I really have a love-hate relationship with the word busy, because I see certain people, like certain of my peers, and they're like oh yeah, I'm so busy. I'm so busy and I'm like okay. Like is it good or bad? If busy's good, then busy's great, but if busy's bad and it stops you from doing things, then it's not really good and really and truthfully, are we really busy? We're only busy for who we want to be busy for.

Speaker 1: 5:03

People will message me and be like hey, dan, um, are you busy? What do you want? Tell me what you want and I'll tell you if I'm busy, because when you're asking me, am I busy? Sometimes I could be sitting here like this and I see the message come through hey, dan, are you busy? If I want to be busy, at that point I'm gonna jump up and do something and be like yeah, babes, I'm so busy, I'm just in the middle of it. What do you want? That's how we gotta start our messages. Stop asking people are they busy? Tell them what you want and they will tell you if they're busy. We're busy for who we want to be busy for. But this week I did. I was a carnival angel this week. I always love being a carnival angel Get to put on a little costume and prance around and look cute and look good and obviously your babes has been in the gym and I've been in the gym.

Speaker 1: 5:57

I feel like I talk about gym every week, but I love the gym. I love the gym and I've been in the gym now probably quick maths since April, may, june, july, august, september, october, five, six, that's six months. I've been straight in the gym six months, started off doing like maybe two days a week. I'm fully on five days a week and the only reason I won't go five days a week is if usually if I've got something to do in the morning. So Thursday morning I wasn't able to go gym because I was on. This morning had a executive car come pick me up at like six o'clock in the morning to take me, I don't know down to Surrey or something, because we were filming from the forest. Some days it just be like that every day is different and so I didn't get to go gym that day. And I'm a morning gymmer like I can go gym in the evening. I'm not gonna go gym in the evening. Who wants to do that? That just sounds like sorry.

Speaker 1: 6:54

I went off on a tangent. I was talking about carnival angels. So I was a carnival angel this week and we were at an event in South Bank. Is Waterloo in South Bank? If Waterloo is in South Bank? I did an event in South Bank. Is Waterloo in South Bank? If Waterloo is in South Bank, I did an event in South Bank and that was really really cool and it's so crazy because, although we've just well say we've just hit October, it's like nearly mid-October. The event was like a kind of a Christmas party, like a pre-Christmas party, but it was more like the venue, kind of a Christmas party, like a pre-Christmas party, but it was more like the venue kind of advertising that they host Christmas events and they're available for Christmas bookings. That's what I believe anyway. And yeah, like I said Thursday, I done this morning, that was so great.

Speaker 1: 7:37

We were modelling shoes, boots, boots. It was a boots episode and got to keep a full outfit and the boots. Oh my God. And do you know what is always great when you get to keep your outfit and you absolutely love your outfit. And my outfit was like a kind of tweed black and white tweed box blazer, zip up jacket type thing and a mini skirt and then I had a polo, a black polo neck on and what's them vest, like a woolly vest and yeah, and then I kept the silver boots because we modeled two pairs of boots, but I kept the silver boots and the outfit was just chef's kiss. I loved it, I absolutely loved it. It was giving clueless energy and I absolutely loved it. I love clueless.

Speaker 1: 8:22

Clueless is one of my favorite 90s films I literally watched every day. I know the whole words to Clueless, so no, test me. So, yeah, that was amazing. And then yesterday was I was just here, I was at the studio. I found it really hard to crack on with the work that I had to do and I done a video and it's like Wednesday, I had a video of me in the carnival costume at the event and then on the Thursday, I put Thursday and I had the video of me, uh do um in my outfit for this morning. And then Friday, just here. And that's why I always say like no, two days are the same. Every day is not glitz and glam and you can't be upset like.

Speaker 1: 9:11

I've gone through phases like last year. I remember feeling really down with myself on the weeks that I weren't doing things because I done a lot. Last year I was at a lot of events, I was booked for a lot of events. I felt like I was traveling here, traveling there, you know, being booked out of London, staying in hotels for these events that I was doing, and then we hit like maybe October, november, and I was just, it was quiet, it was silence, and I was like I'm useless. That wasn't what I felt. I don't know, that might have been what I felt, that wasn't, I don't know. I just kind of felt like I'm not doing enough.

Speaker 1: 9:55

I had spent the whole of spring summer swanning about being this big ting and then all of a sudden, like what, no one's booking me, what the hell? I felt shitty. I'm not even gonna lie and I tell you. I said to myself I'm not doing enough, I should be doing more. I should be doing this every single week, I should be booked every single week. And the reality of it is is it's not happening. That's not what's happening.

Speaker 1: 10:24

And so there is a lot of people that be like oh yeah, I see you, dan, you're so busy. And I'm like, if you only knew like I'd love to be busy, I'd absolutely love to be busy doing the things that I love to do, week in and week out, I wouldn't even complain. I probably would. We always got something to complain about. I love it. I love doing events. I love being booked. I love staying in hotels for free. I love getting my travel paid for for free to go to these events? Yeah, man, but I'm not busy. But if you ask me, am I busy? Trust me, I can find something to do. Sometimes I'm not busy and I've got a whole load of things to do. So I just wanted to. What was the? What was I even talking about? I didn't even know what I was discussing. I went off on a tangent. But that's my week. That was my roundup of my week. So, yeah, how has your week been? Holler at your girl. Let me know what you've been up to. Let me know what you're dealing with. Let me know where we're at. We're in our last quarter. We have like three months less than till the end of the year.

Speaker 1: 11:32

Are you already thinking about your goals for next year? That's? I mean, think about your goals. You know, when they say, we always say, oh right, next year I'm gonna do this and monday, when monday starts, I'm gonna start my diet. When the beginning of the year starts, I'm gonna do this. Why wait till monday? Why wait till the beginning of the year? Like if you absolutely with all your heart, know what it is that you want to do and you know it's gonna bring you joy and you know it's gonna make you feel good and you know it's to do something for you, just start now or don't fucking start. Like, don't start your diet on Monday. If you really want to start your diet and if you really want to feel good, just start now.

Speaker 1: 12:14

Like or you really want to eat that, that Krispy Kreme donut? Eat the Krispy Kreme donut. Like, eat the Krispy Kreme donut. Like, either eat the donut or don't eat the donut. Do you know what I'm saying? Like and as a gym person, a gym buddy, a gym girly, I'm all about my body. I'm all about looking good, feeling good, smelling good most of the time. But do what you do what makes you feel good. And if you're you're you, I feel like you have to really really be ready to to do the thing, to do that thing, to do the exercise and to do the eat. Eat the healthy foods and stuff. You have to be ready, otherwise you're literally just neglecting yourself from joy. I love a donut and if I want to eat a donut, I'm gonna eat a donut. But I guess I could say that because I put the time in and I've put the time in to really be like my body is my. I put you on a pedestal, babe, because you look fucking amazing. So if I want to eat the donut, I'm gonna eat the donut, because I've worked hard this week. So, like I said, figure out what it is that you want to do for yourself and figure out how you want to feel, and figure out how you want to look, and figure out what your goal is, what you're aiming for, and then do whatever is going to get you closer to that goal. But if you want to have the ting, have the ting.

Speaker 1: 13:33

Life is so frigging short and it's going so fast. And I say life is so short. Eight years ain't really short, but for some people it's shorter. We never know when it's gonna end. We never know when our last breath is gonna get taken.

Speaker 1: 13:46

So do you know what I'm saying? Can you imagine, right, this is intrusive thoughts moments, my intrusive thoughts? I can't even tell you the one that I had in the gym, um, because I don't know. I can't deal with the, I can't deal with the backlash, but my intrusive thoughts are wild. Can you imagine dying, right, and then you get to heaven? Wherever you go to, I don't know, but let's just say heaven innit. Let's say you get to heaven innit, and then your only regret is that you never ate that donut in the morning or lunchtime.

Speaker 1: 14:21

There was a a someone bought like 12. Is it 24 pack or 12 pack? For your thing, you can get both. Let's say, someone bought a 24 pack of krispy kreme donuts and there was an ice glazed one and there was like a jam one, and you wanted both of them and you had none of them and they were left in the box and you never had it. And then you end up having I don't know some kind of heart attack and the next minute you're at the pearly freaking gates and all you can think about is them donuts, and you're never gonna get them donuts again. Have the donut. That's all I'm saying. Enjoy yourself, have fun.

Speaker 1: 14:54

But I jumped onto someone's live this week on Instagram. Boy was I happy. I jumped onto this person's life because she was talking about, uh, leveling up. It was about leveling up your social media, getting your clients doing booking clients. There was a lot of stuff she was talking about, but one thing she spoke about was pricing. She was saying that basically not everyone can afford your services and that's fine.

Speaker 1: 15:23

So a lot of the times what we do is we. Someone will ask us what our price is and we prejudge them. I don't know what it is, what we do, so we all do it. We kind of look at them and we, in our heads, we go into this thing of if I told them my price, they're not going to buy, so I'm going to put it down, um, but that's us assuming that they don't have money. That's one us assuming that they don't have money. That's also us assuming that they wouldn't. They don't find our stuff valuable enough or to the value of what we value it, so they won't buy it. That's also us thinking that our stuff isn't good enough. There's so many of these thoughts because whatever it is that you do, so I'm going to talk for myself.

Speaker 1: 16:11

But why would I spend? Why would I spend hours on making something and creating something, and yet not even just hours, years, because it's years of experience that goes into the stuff that I've made. Sourcing stuff, sourcing stuff, second hand foot, walking up and down the freaking high street, going into shops, finding something that is unique anyway, then upcycling it with the knowledge and experience that I have, doing the actual work on my machines that I've bought, paid for I'm an ambassador for whatever to only knock my price down more than half price as soon as the moment someone answers me how much is that? And I say I say that I don't do that all the time. I do do it way too much, and I'm not the only one. Why do we do that? Why are we doing that? Why are we assuming that people can't afford our stuff or they're not going to want to afford our stuff? However, even if we do assume that someone can't afford it or they won't want to spend it or they're gonna think our price is too high, so what? So what, it is too high, but so is every. So is everything?

Speaker 1: 17:36

I went to go get toothpaste the other day and I was shocked. I was shocked. I saw five pounds. It's expensive for toothpaste, but can I afford five pound toothpaste? Yes, I can. If I really want the five pound toothpaste, I can afford the five pound toothpaste. I freaking, got his, his smile. It was 20 pounds. I don't know if I paid that much because buy one, get one, free it. So they were 10 pound each. I bought it because Kylie asked me to. I bought it, I can. Can I afford £5 toothpaste? Yes, I can.

Speaker 1: 18:06

Can someone afford the prices of what you are charging for your stuff? Yes, they can. How do you know that? Because people are buying it from someone else, they're buying it somewhere else. Your customers, or your friends and family that you're selling to that aren't actually your customers. By the way, they're spending weekly money on their hair, nails and their outfits, even if someone shops in sheen. But they go on a hill, a hill, hill, hill. But they go on a haul like every month and spend 150 pounds, 100 pounds on a sheen haul, on stuff that they kind of know is shit. I'm not gonna lie, they can afford it. They can afford it. So if they want to buy it, they're gonna buy it.

Speaker 1: 18:48

So we need to stop focusing on what we think people can afford. We need to stop focusing on who can afford it. Our price is our price. I'm saying this right now. I have no more discount vouchers available. My discount vouchers have finished. There are no more vouchers available. I'm sorry. The price is the price. The price is the price. Oh yeah, if you want it, this is how much it is. Oh, my back, sorry. Hang on, I want to be like you. Why is my back itching? I feel like I've got ants in my pants in my top. The price is the price, and the key is to believe that people are just going to pay your price and people are going to see the value in what it is that you're doing.

Speaker 1: 19:40

And what also goes hand in hand in that is is the social media we need to. The social media comes with it, because it's like how are you showing people why they need your stuff, or you just trying to sell them something? What is it? What does it do? Why do I sell them something? What is it? What does it do? Why do I want it? Why is it amazing? Why would I want this thing that you made and you know? The other thing that I find that we do a lot is we, because we want our friends to support us. We get, we offer them discount. Just oh, if you buy this, I'll sell it to you for this much. If they wanted it, they'd let you know they wanted it, that's all.

Speaker 1: 20:21

So, yeah, let me know how you're getting on with or is this something that you find is plaguing your business? Is it something that bothers you? Is it something that you go through when it comes to giving your price list? How much does it cost and you're like and then, all of a sudden, you're like, you're thinking in your head, you're like, okay, when someone asks I'm going to charge this much. And as soon as they ask, like, wow, wow, wow, hey, it's 20 pound cheaper. We need to stop doing it to ourselves. We deserve to get paid. We deserve to get paid for me. This is all I do. This is what it is like. I don't have it's not my side hustle. And I think people are really shopping and they're like oh, is that your full-time thing? Yeah, it is. It's not a side hustle if you lot don't buy from me. Um, it's what it is. So, yeah, I think I ain't got much else that I want to talk about this week. Well, I have. I have got loads more that I'd love to talk about, but I'm also going to save some stuff for next week as well, because I mean, now I've talked too much. You get me. That's my jamaican accent, it's.

Speaker 1: 21:29

I've been watching pop the balloon or pop the balloon or Love, and as toxic as it is, it's like it's frigging hilarious. And the Jamaican one. I put it on my stories this week and you lot were like send me the link. So I'm really sorry. I've got a few of you lot hooked on it. My cousin messaged me. She's like Dan, I'm on holiday and I'm watching the whole series this holiday and do you know what it is Like?

Speaker 1: 21:57

I said when Pop the Balloon or Find Love first came out and I was watching the American one and I just realised the disparities between the men and women. I was like you don't have to talk to people like that. And women, what's wrong with you? And men, what's wrong with you? But the Jamaican Pop the Balloon or Find Love, not going to lie, jamaicans are different, I don't know, it's just different. When they do it, their cusses hit different. They like cuss you and you're like did they finesse me? I'm not even sure it's absolutely hilarious. It's my little guilty pleasure and also it just helps me practice my accent for when I move over to Jamaica, if that ever happens, because this is going to say this one time and maybe a hundred, not staying in the UK forever at all I need to be like right my fingers.

Speaker 1: 22:51

Can you see that? They're turning numb? They're turning numb. Winter's only just even, not even hit. I feel like we're in autumn. This is actually autumn time. My fingers have gone numb and it's not actually even that cold. Like I'm just saying, I'm travelling soon I'm out of here. I told you that last week Sorry, what just happened? What just happened? What just happened, I don't know Told you guys last week.

Speaker 1: 23:20

Clean and Tidy Home Show is coming up on the 19th and the 20th. If you guys need any more information about what's happening, definitely hit me up in my stories. I'm going to be down there on both days and this week I got some exciting information to do with the Clean and Tidy Home Show. So not only is your girl the host of the extra stage on the Saturday and the Sunday I will be hosting, I'm also going to be doing a demo on the demo stage which is just showing you guys how to have your repair kit ready. Get a little tear in your jeans or a rip in your coat or replace a button? I'll be showing you how to have the perfect kit for your repairs, which is a no-sew, you know you don't need to use a sewing machine. And I've also word on the street is that your girl is co-hosting. I hope I'm allowed to say this information your girl is co-hosting the award ceremony at the end of the sunday.

Speaker 1: 24:19

So on sunday they have the award ceremony where we'll be giving out awards for different things in the whole cleaning um, cleaning community and I'm gonna be co-hosting it with georgina and I'm so, so freaking excited. I got the news so you can ask us like, so what, excuse me? Excuse me, yeah. So I'm co-hosting the, the on the main stage on the Sunday, so catch me there. Uh, I'm gonna be there at three o'clock, but also just catch me on the extra stage, because I'm gonna be there all weekend just interviewing amazing people having fun, being extra and being frigging awesome. So make sure you tell a friend to tell a friend, because that's where we're at and that's where I expect to see you.

Speaker 1: 25:04

So we've reached the end of this week's podcast. Oh, I wonder if there's a sound, you know when you press the sound button. Oh, I'm going to find the sound, don't worry, I'll get the sound. We've reached the end of this week's podcast. Oh, I'm gonna find the sound, don't worry, I'll get it done. We've reached the end of this week's podcast and, yeah, I just want to remind you guys that you're freaking amazing. Had to tell you that I want to congratulate you just for being you. I want to congratulate you for getting through this week. I want to congratulate you for the things that you go through in silence and you think no one knows, but they do, but they can't push it too much because you don't want to tell anyone. I want to congratulate you just for being freaking amazing and I want to congratulate you for the times that felt really hard and you didn't know how you was going to get through it. But here you are because you did.

Speaker 1: 26:00

We need to stop making only a big deal out of the big deals and make everything a big deal, or make a big deal out of the small deals, because it's not only the big deals that matter. Sometimes it's the small deals that have knock-on effects for the even bigger things. It's the small little things that we do on a daily basis. Or it's the small little things that we do once a week or once a month or every blue moon that really catches people's attentions. It's their small deals, but they might mean a lot to us or they might mean a lot to other people. They might mean a lot to the people that are watching and thinking that's such a minor. I probably touch more people with the little things that I do on a daily basis, like just showing you guys just the raw and real shit, than a massive, massive big deal that I've got with a brand. Let's make more, more noise for the small deals because also, what happens is, as a person receiving it feels like we're only doing something if it's a big deal. We've only done a good job if we've done a done a big deal, we've had a big deal, we've hit a big deal, because that's what everyone's making a big deal from. So let's change that. Let's make a big deal out of the small deals and let's just fucking rock it and congratulate your people on all the little things that they're doing, because that's what really makes a big difference. I love you guys.

Speaker 1: 27:33

Peace out a town down west side is the best side. Do I believe that? I don't even know. I don't know, but you know, what I do know is wherever I'm at the vibes at and the vibes here in my little studio right now, my little mannequin, I'm a little self, I'm a little jumper, I'm a little extra, because I'm extra. That's where the vibes are and that's where you need to be at every single week. We're here. We've been here for over a year now, not here, but on the so flipping extra podcast and you know what. You know what's really exciting? I really, really, really honestly feel like bigger and better things are coming, not making a big deal out of it yet, but it's the small things that are gonna make a big deal. Love guys, bye.